I watched the video that Elliot Rodgers released before he slaughtered all those young women who had nothing to do with him. I got very angry and I outlined some of the reasons we need feminism. Not female domination, but a stretch for equality and an attempt to neutralise some of the strange things people have come up with over the years that has mutated what should be a natural and relaxed enviroment.
Let’s take a look at the reasons behind his ‘retribution’
Because College is the place where all the good stuff happens:
This is one of those ideas that has been built up by teen movies, sororities, the idea of moving away from home and ‘becoming a man’. The truth is, these are places that have been made for the sake of institutionalised education, places that provide higher learning and a place for people to stay as they may be travelling from a long distance away. That was the original idea. Make friends, try new things, but don’t think that college is the be-all, end-all of your life. It’s not. It’s possibly one of the shortest percentages of your life span. Also, being a man has nothing to do with sex. Being a man is about finding yourself, what you want, what you can achieve in life, what abilities you have and how to use those to your best advantage. Being a man is about learning to listen, not just nodding your head an smiling when a person unloads their problems on you. Think about what they’re saying and offer what you think is good advice, if you don’t have anything to say, be honest and say so. Offer comfort and expect nothing in return. If you’re offering comfort to get something out of it, then you’re being dishonest and that is unattractive and often a deal breaker. Being a man is about discovering your capabilities to better the world, in the smallest or largest ways possible. It’s about becoming the best human you can, and sex has nothing to do with this. Seriously, it has nothing to do with being a man.
Because if I make sexual advances I get rejected:
If you’re approaching a woman only for sex, you’re doing it wrong. Women don’t ‘throw themselves’ at men because they necessarily want sex. It happens occasionally, but it’s the exception, not the rule. Most of the time, a woman wants an experience, she wants to try new things as well, she likes being excited by someone, what they think, what they do and what they might get out of it, emotionally or physically. They want the fairytale, even if it’s only for one night. Yes, women may find the bulkier muscled men more attractive initially, but if you don’t have that in your favour, you need to be interesting or have something in common with a person, not just expect that you being ‘nice’ to them is going to make them hop into bed. Even the ‘obnoxious brutes’ can have ways of being nice to women, and for them that can also not be enough. Be a human with interests, thoughts and expectations outside of sexual activity and you’ll go a lot further in being an interesting and appealing person.
Because I live a life of loneliness, rejection, and unfulfilled desires:
Open your eyes. Every single person in the world, whether you think they have or not, has felt these things. Rejection hits hard, and the only way to move on from it is to let it go. It’s harder than it sounds, but very few people always succeed the first time around. Dust yourself off and try again. Keep trying until you die, otherwise you’ll get nowhere. Every person feels lonely. If it’s because you have to work the night when everyone else is out, because you’re the only single person in your group of friends or because you haven’t had a heartfelt conversation with anyone in years. Because everyone seems happy and you feel depressed, because you can’t afford to do the things your friends do or because you’re not quite as talented as the people around you seem to be. There are hundreds of people that feel these and more. If you feel them, you aren’t alone. Some people find answers, some people don’t. The best thing to do is don’t separate yourself more on purpose. If you’re feeling alone, try and keep busy or do things to keep your mind off it. Spend time with your family, or even people that you don’t usually spend time with. As for unfulfilled desires, meet the world. If you think you’re the only person in the world with unfulfilled desires, you’re wrong. Very wrong. As any person whether they ever missed out on something they wanted, for whatever reason. The answer will always be yes. Look for new desires, find new dreams, some of them may surprise you and give you something you never expected.
Let’s not be dishonest, he was a twisted guy and nothing about what he did is ok, but we also need to remember that a lot of his reasonings behind his behaviour are born of media misconceptions and the now twisted perception of educational institutions and the sured environment defining how young boys become men. A lot of it is minformation, and while all of his decisions are untimately made by him, we still need to learn from this that thll feminism and that the world is a long way from being perfect. No need to be rude to them, but if you see people harbouring any of the same misconceptions hat Elliot Rogers did, please politely set them straight.
I just wrote a very long rant about art and mature content and I thought it best to summarise my slightly incoherant essay into a much shorter expression.
I love art. I crave art. I don’t care about nudity, I have most of those parts and half the rest of the people in the world have the rest. I crave ideas, representations of obscure details and stories. But art for the sake of sexual arousal irritates me. A lot. Especially when it is created for the sole purpose of self gratification and most other thought for artistic principles is thrown out the window. Mature content filters fill me with anxiety because I am too curious not to know, but no filter means being flooded with rubbish.
Nudity does not automatically equal sex
The beauty of the human body does not automatically equal sex.
But most importanly, sex does not automatically equal art.
So the Tamora Pierce books need to become movies/mini series’.
So I’m not sure if it’s the people posting on my dash of if it’s really a massive isue, but there is way more anger than this should be generating.
My answer. You’re allowed to NOT like the film. It’s ok, there are many movies I don’t like that are very popular; the hangover, the newer Batman films, and even *GASP* The hunger games.
But the amount of anger surrounding the subject is getting a little out of hand. Is it even a fandom now? I propose that any dissatisfaction is dealt with by sending a polite letter. Yes I’m serious. Outline the reasons (politely and with as few exclamation points as possible) that you disliked the film and outline the kinds of changes you’d like to see in future disney films (applicable to anything really, not just films or disney). If they don’t listen, be persistent, but stay polite. If they still don’t listen, be more persistent, and even more polite.
It is a useful and important exercise to analyse films, our culture and what it exhibits to children, and it’s good to enjoy that process. It’s important to point out the flaws, but remember that everything is flawed, and don’t be too angry if a particular aspect of the media is slowly climbing on the bandwagon rather than jumping right on, it’s hard to get out of set habits. Don’t get angry and criticise that there aren’t enough POC, LGBTQA or varying class types being represented, just ask them for more. Princess and the frog? Yes please, can we have more like that? Moana is coming out next year? Send a letter outlining your cheerful hopes for the film. Who knows, you may give someone an idea.
My answer is: Don’t get angry, get persuasive, tell them what you want, not the people on tumblr, facebook or other platforms, send the studios a letter or email. encourage your friends to do the same. They’re more likely to listen to a million requests than to a million criticisms. You can still tell them you’re disappointed, you don’t have to change your opinions, just change your approach.